Wedding Planning & Preparation

getting started

congratulations!

You have a ring on your finger and a bright, sparkling future ahead of you! Let the wedding planning begin! To ensure the process is as stress free as possible, follow these tried and true tips.

stay organized

While it may seem like a no-brainer, when you are trying to choose a  photographer during your lunch break and trying to book a reception hall between social commitments, things can get a little harried. Planning a wedding is not a simple “sit-down-and-work-till-it’s- done” kind of project; oftentimes you have multiple projects at once. So stay organized!

settle on a wedding budget

Where does wedding planning truly begin? With the numbers! Plan your budget before you get carried away with other wedding details. Determine how much you want to spend and how much assistance, if any, you will receive from family members.

You will also need to decide who pays for what. See the traditional breakdown below. While these financial roles are generally followed, there are modern day variations. As the average marriage age for couples rises, many couples undertake the wedding expenses themselves. Sometimes families will give a specified dollar amount and allow the couple to spend it however they choose. Others will offer to help out with a particular aspect of the wedding. No matter what financial assistance is offered, the wedding is ultimately the couple’s financial responsibility.

Be realistic about your expenditures. Make a list of all the different vendors you will need and allocate a portion of your budget to each, prioritizing when necessary. If the costs keep piling up, don’t panic! There are ways to trim costs without sacrificing vendor quality.

Once you have settled on the bottom line, secure estimated prices with a contract to help keep you within your budget. See the “Budget Expense Record” in the Worksheet section to help keep track of your finances. And stick to your budget!
Financial experts advise against going into debt for your wedding because it is much better to start a marriage without needless liabilities.

using professionals

A wedding is probably the most expensive party you will ever throw. It is tempting
for a couple to try to save money by enlisting the help of family and friends or by undertaking much of the responsibility themselves, but there are clear advantages
to working with the experts. Weddings are a unique event and those who specialize in them know how to handle just about any circumstance a couple may have. Wedding professionals deal with weddings on a daily basis and build their businesses on knowing what is proper and popular when it comes to weddings.

When choosing professionals to work with, keep both the wedding budget and quality of services desired in mind. Compare the work of different professionals. Choose people who know their business, who show interest and kindness, and who listen and spend time with their customers. In businesses that have multi-person staffs, be sure to meet with the person who will actually handle your wedding and see samples of their work.

Make appointments instead of just dropping in. This is both thoughtful and necessary because of the professionals’ own busy schedules. It also ensures that complete attention is given to your own particular meeting. Keep appointments and be on time. Get back to them when they are waiting to hear back. Let the businesses know if their services will not be needed (other couples may be missing out because a date was held). Be  organized and try to give as much information as possible so they can do their job.

contracts

To ensure that your day is as close to perfect as you imagine, it is necessary to “get it in writing.” Paperwork is certainly a less glamorous aspect of wedding planning, but it plays a crucial role in keeping misunderstandings to a minimum.

When a wedding professional provides a contract, make sure you read every line and ask any questions you may have. Compile a list of details you find important so you can incorporate them into the contract.

Make sure your contracts include basic information such as the time and date of the wedding. You will also want to include more specific points such as a spending cap (if there is a clause allowing for unforeseen expenses) and detailed refund policies (in case you want to cancel or they don’t fulfill their end of the agreement).

Even if you have signed a contract, you can still make changes. Just make sure the change is in writing and signed
by both parties. Don’t forget to keep a copy of all the paperwork!

marriage legalities

More than likely you have dreamed of your wedding day since you were a little girl. You have imagined every detail from your dress to the flowers to the food. Sometimes it is hard to see beyond all the wedding plans to life afterward. Marriage is not only a binding commitment in the eyes of you and your spouse, but also in the eyes of the law. The legal ramifications are far-reaching. You may not be aware that married persons have many legal rights and benefits. Legal advisors can help you navigate this category of law that now applies to you. Whether you need advice on how to handle prenuptial agreements and marital property, or you want to learn about the various tax, estate planning, government, employment, consumer, and decision-making benefits you can receive, it is helpful to consult the professionals.

who pays for what

Today as many couples are waiting until later in life to get married, many are taking on more of the expense of the wedding than in years past. Although traditionally the bride and her family have paid for the majority of the wedding, modern times are showing countless options when it comes to who pays for what. Depending on the financial status of the couple and their respective families, costs may be shared on any or all items relating to the wedding. While some parents may offer help with a particular part of the wedding, others will give a gift of a specified dollar amount to let the couple choose how to spend it. Whatever decisions are made concerning who pays for what, the couple is ultimately responsible for the costs and should be appreciative of any assistance they receive.
The following list of "Who Pays For What" offers both a traditional break-down as well as some modern ideas:

traditionally the bride and her family usually pay for:

• Invitations and announcements (including postage)

• Bride's wedding dress and accessories

• Bridesmaids' and Flower Girl bouquets

• Groom's Boutonniere

• Bridesmaids' party or luncheon

• Flowers and rental costs for the church and reception site

• Engagement and wedding photography and videography

• Musicians at both the wedding and reception

• Food, beverages, and related professional services (catering) for the reception

• Wedding cake

• Gifts for the bridesmaids (and accommodations, if necessary)

• Groom's wedding gift

• Groom's wedding ring

• Transportation for the wedding party on the wedding day

traditionally the groom and his family usually pay for:

• Marriage license

• Clergyman's fee

• Rehearsal dinner

• Bride's bouquet and going-away flowers

• Corsages for mothers and boutonnieres for men in the wedding party

• Gifts for the groomsmen and ushers (and accommodations, if necessary)

• Bride's wedding gift

• Bride's engagement and wedding rings

• Honeymoon

• Groom's wedding attire

some contemporary ideas

There are countless options, to be sure. The bride's bouquet, for example, can be included with the flowers her family buys. The mothers' and grandmothers' flowers, as well as the men's boutonnieres, can also be part of this package.

The groom's side can offer to share the cost of any part or all of the wedding.

Dresses and tuxedos (or suits) worn by the bridesmaids and groomsmen are usually paid for by each attendant. The bride and groom, however, can offer to pay for all or part of them if they wish.

Remember, tradition does not always have to be served, nor does etiquette always have to be followed. Whatever the source of the money, it is the bride and groom's wedding, and their wishes are paramount.

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